Monday, August 19, 2013

a love letter to my littlest little.

my sweet little boy, i am so sorry i have taken so long to get to this.  our lives have been nothing short of insane and keeping everyone alive has been the main priority:)

i should probably also apologize for splashing every detail of your life across social media, but, like your sister, you are loved by so many that span many i hope that one day you will view this as a blessing, not your ridiculous mother sharing everything on the internet:)

asher graham, i seriously can't wrap my mind around the fact that you have turned one year old.  this last year has been the absolute fastest year of my life and to be honest, it kind of panics me to see how fast you and your sister are growing.

you have lived up to the anticipation of your name, asher, meaning happy.  your ridiculously adorable dimples in combination with those piercing blue eyes are nothing short of perfect.  your curly "business hair" (more commonly known as a mullet) is hysterical and i have absolutely no intentions of cutting it, even though i'm starting to get a little bit of pressure.  i melt every morning i walk in to get you out of your crib and you jump up and down with the biggest grin on your face.  seriously, MELT.  you wear your heart on your sleeve and if i'm being honest, you are fairly whiny and get your feelings hurt quite often which i'm told is normal for baby boys.  you don't want to miss a moment of the action, which marci has coined FOMO (fear of missing out).  you are such a little lover all while being the most rough-and-tumble thing i've ever seen.  you are clumsy, busy and totally fearless, which in turn leads to you being covered from head to toe with bumps and bruises.  you are messy and always hungry.  ALWAYS.  you are BIG.  like really big, which means you better be one heck of a ball player one day.  or golfer.  or left-handed pitcher.  basically, daddy and i are counting on you and sister to be our retirement policies:)

you hit the ground running and don't stop til you get back in your crib, which makes for one tired - but happy - mommy.  i love watching you grow and tinker with things to discover how they work.  although it drives me nuts, i love that everything you pick up you do so with the intent to break it.  i've grown quite fond of it and now it just makes me giggle.

you and sister have a love-hate relationship already.  one minute you'll be laughing, giggling and hugging, and then i turn around and someone has whacked the other one in the head with a plastic golf club.  or kicked someone off the couch... or pulled hair... or drank out of the other's cup.  but at the end of the day, you two are truly best friends which i love.

since it's been so long, your one year statistics will be in your baby book (which i have still yet to order.  i'm so sorry number two.)

as of today (15 1/2 months) you weigh 28 pounds 6 ounces (90%) and are 34 inches tall (97%).  you have fourteen teeth and RUN EVERYWHERE.  anytime i holler at you to come to me or to go inside, you put your head down and take off with your arms behind you, much like some sort of olympic runner at the finish line.  so funny.  so cute.

my constant prayer for you is that you grow to be a man of integrity who loves Jesus with your whole being.  your father and i will NEVER stop sharing the beauty of the gospel with you and teaching you the freedom that is found when we are in Christ.  this world will tell you otherwise, but i promise sweet boy, your identity is found in a much higher purpose than the lies that will be told to you throughout this life.  i pray that you will be strong, courageous and fight for truth and justice.  i don't consider myself an old lady at this point, but i have seen too many "men" that are weak and have found their identity in things that are destructive.  i pray you walk to the beat of your own drum, that you stay fearless, that you stay brave.  i pray that you have the gift of your father to see big picture and know that in the end, the high road - the road that draws you near to Jesus - may not be easy, but it will be worth it.

i pray that your spirit will be one full of kindness and mercy, and that you will be a living example of Christ's love and grace every day of your life.  i pray that you will be so totally sold out for Christ and his purpose that you will live every day fearless and joyful - so much so that others will see Christ bursting from your heart.

the gift of being your mom is priceless and there are no words that can even come close to telling you how much i love you.  you have helped me loosen up as a mom and to help me focus on the important things - maybe because i don't have time to worry about it all, or that i'm just flat exhausted - but at the end of the day, there is nothing that brings joy to my heart like knowing God chose me to be YOUR mother.  you have had me so completely wrapped around your finger from day one and i can't imagine you not being a part of our family.

but as for you, o man of God, flee these things.  pursue righteousness, godliness, faith, love, steadfastness, gentleness.  fight the good fight of the faith.  take hold of the eternal life to which you were called and about which you made the good confession in the presence of many witnesses.  
1 timothy 6:  11 - 12 

i love you more than words boogy woogy.  you are truly a gift from our Creator.  i will never cease in praising Christ for His perfect design of YOU.  hallelujah.

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